DEAR ABBY: My sister-in-law “Leah” has been a poor money manager all her life. She is in significant credit card debt and had to borrow money to help pay for her wedding, despite the fact that she has been a teacher for decades. She has never been a saver — always a spender.
When my husband passed away recently, he left me with $1 million in life insurance proceeds. When Leah found out about it (I’m not sure how), she asked me to lend her some money to get back on her feet. When I refused, my other sister-in-law chastised me, saying that my husband would have lent her the money. Leah has been bailed out a few times by her sister but never by my husband. Am I wrong to stand my ground? — NOT AN ENABLER
DEAR NOT AN ENABLER: My heart goes out to you for the loss of your husband. Leah may be using the word “lend,” but believe me when I say you would never see that money again. If she wants to get out of debt, she needs to speak to a credit counselor, not her brother’s grieving widow. If she brings it up again, tell her to visit the National Foundation for Credit Counseling at nfcc.org.
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