DEAR ABBY: I have a neurological disorder and can no longer keep up with my friends (who used to be my friends). I don’t explain the problems I have and why I can’t do the things I used to do unless they ask. I still drive, but I have trouble walking. I have a wonderful husband who helps me all the time. I’m lucky I can do what I do, but I am very limited.
I don’t know how to explain it to people who look at me like I’m making it up. Abby, I have polyneuropathy and have had seven back surgeries. I have arthritis in all my joints. I live in constant pain, but it doesn’t “look” like I do. How do I explain my disability? I’m tired of being at home and not getting phone calls anymore. How do I tell them there are still things I can do? — DOWN BUT NOT OUT IN RHODE ISLAND
DEAR DOWN: By not discussing your problem, you have contributed to the isolation you are feeling. Not every disability is obvious. Your friends may think you are avoiding them because you don’t want to be with them.
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